When I wrote the title to this piece, I immediately switched tabs to do something more compelling and interesting. But, I've come back now to finish this piece because otherwise it wouldn't exist. Sustainable creative expression is a tiny fraction inspiration followed by a grind.
What I came here to observe was the nature of creativity. The most meaningful output of an artist often comes at the beginning a new process. I think of Mathematicians and artist geniuses like Orson Welles, Bob Dylan, all the members of the Beatles, most musicians in general, and all artists who reach their zenith relatively early into their career and descend from there. Likewise, I was going to compare that left distributed output and achievement of creative output with my productivity over the last month on this blog. I had most of my posts in the first week and a half and now have had about two a week since then.
But, it's become evident through exploring myself while I do this that the left distribution is my own damn fault. It's not the nature of creativity, but my nature to do things less if I feel like I've accomplished something meaningful. I think this is actually why most artists who achieve meaningful work have left distributed output of meaningful work. It's because they just aren't interested in working as much at it. It's because they don't put their butt in their seat and work. Or, in Orson Welles case, they are barred from the creative freedom they once had. But, that's pretty rare.
There are people like Radiohead that continue to output excellent music and continue to evolve. Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds do this too. And, Neil Young's annual output clearly sets the standard for sustainable creative output. In comedy, the Neil Young is Woody Allen, Louis CK, or Lena Dunham or any series writer really. These people write constantly. It's not just something they try to do every day. They're writing for twelve hours a day.
Creativity is measured by meaningful output, but meaningful output is ultimately the product of prolific output. It's the result of doing the work. And, here I am writing this mutha when there are a million things else I'd like to do. Is this meaningful? I don't think it's that meaningful to other people, but for me it serves as a reminder that I need to output more than I did in those first two weeks. But, as I think about that, I feel the need to protect myself from criticism by outputting only work that meets higher standards of meaning. And, I need to get rid of that need because that perception is breaking the process of creation.
I've got to get back to the idea that this is just another meaningless blog and not a tool for career expansion if I can ever hope to make it a career. We'll see if I continue to do that or if I fold up my stuff and shut my face.